Tom was walking down the street when he sees a funeral procession. At the head was the casket, behind was a man walking a very large dog and behind him were 300 people. Tom walks over to the guy with the dog and asks who’s funeral is this? The man answers, “My mother-in-law’s.” Tom wishes his condolences and asks, “She must of been a very important person, but what’s with the dog?” He answers, “This is the dog that killed her!” So Tom asks, “can I borrow the dog for an hour?” He responds, “Get on line!”
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What do you call a lion wearing a cravat and a flower in its mane? A dandy lion.
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What do you call a dinosaur with magic powers? Tyrannosaurus Hex.
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What's a cow's favorite moosical note? Beef-flat!
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What do you call a dog wearing ear muffs? Anything you want, he cant hear you.
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