One goldfish to his tankmate: "If there's no God, who changes the water?"
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Chuck Norris doesn't play dead for bears, bears play dead for Chuck Norris.
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How do you tell if a black girls pregnant? Shove a banana up her vagina and if you pull it out half eaten then you got a monkey on the way.
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A baby snake asked it's mom, "Mommy are we poisonous?" The mother snake responded, "Yes honey, but why do you want to know?" The baby snake responded, "Because I just bit myself..."
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Where do Danish cows come from? Cowpenhagenf.
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