What happened when the shark became famous? He tured into a starfish.

Chuck Norris can make a turtle go faster.

Three bulls heard the rancher was bringing another bull onto the ranch. First Bull: "I've been here five years. I'm not giving this new bull any of my 100 cows." Second Bull: "I've been here three years and have earned my right to 50 cows. I'm keeping all my cows." Third Bull: "I've only been here a year, and so far, you guys have only let me have 10 cows. I may not be as big as you fellows, but I'm keeping all 10 of my cows." Just then an 18-wheeler pulls up in the pasture carrying the biggest bull they've ever seen. At 4,700 pounds, each step he takes strains the steel ramp. First Bul ... read more

Why does a chicken lay eggs? Because if she dropped them, they’d break.

When Chuck Norris was a baby he didnt have teddy bears. He had real bears.