Three guys are on a plane, ones black, ones white, and ones Mexican. The pilot says: "there's to much weight you all need to throw something off the plane." The black guy throws his Jordan's and says: "we have to many of these in our country" The Mexican throws off his lawn mower and says: "we have to many of these in our country". The white guys throws the Mexican and says: "we have to many of these in our country"

A blonde and a brunette are skydiving. The brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord and nothing happens. She pulls the emergency cord and still nothing. The blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells, "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"

When Chuck Norris goes through airport security he makes them take their shoes off.

Chuck Norris was once asked to place his legs and fists in the cargo bay of a plane because weapons aren't allowed in the cabin.

The FAA has a device for testing the strength of windshields on airplanes. They point this thing at the windshield of the aircraft and shoot a dead chicken at about the speed the air-craft normally flies at it. If the windshield doesn't break, it's likely to survive a real collision with a bird during flight. The British had recently built a new locomotive that could pull a train faster than any before it. They were not sure that its windshield was strong enough so they borrowed the testing device from the FAA, reset it to approximate the maximum speed of the locomotive, loaded in the dead c ... read more