You are so old, the candles on your birthday cake raised earths temperature by 3 degrees.

 6904

2  

Yo momma's so old she knew the Virgin Mary when she was 10 and said Lil Mary will never amount to anything.

 12000

10  

You must keep in shape. My grandmother started walking five kilometers when she was 60 and now she's 97, and we don't have a clue where she is!

 407

0  

Yo mama so old Moses is in her year book.

 302

0  

Yo mama so old she ran track with the dinosaurs.

 1082

0