Q: What is the definition of "accountant"?
A: Someone who solves a problem you didn't know you had in a way you don't understand.
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Q: If an accountant's wife cannot sleep, what does she say?
A: "Darling, could you tell me about your work."
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A fine is a tax for doing wrong.
A tax is a fine for doing well.
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The clerk walks into the boss's office and says,
"The auditors have just left, sir."
"Have they finished checking the books?", asks the boss.
"Very thoroughly," is the reply.
"Well, what did they say", says the boss.
"They want 15% to keep quiet."
