Q: What is the definition of "accountant"?
A: Someone who solves a problem you didn't know you had in a way you don't understand.
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Q: What do you call a group financial controller who's lost his job?
A: Bob.
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Q: What do you call a financial controller who always works through lunch, takes two days holiday every two years, is in the office every weekend, and leaves every night after 10 p.m.?
A: Lazy.
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How does Santa's accountant value his sleigh?
Net Present Value.
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Q: When does a person decide to become an accountant?
A: When he realizes he doesn't have the charisma to succeed as an undertaker.
