What do you call an accountant with an opinion? An auditor.

Q: If an accountant's wife cannot sleep, what does she say? A: "Darling, could you tell me about your work."

Did you hear about the cannibal Tax Accountant? She charges an arm and a leg.

An accountant is walking along the beach (also, not the joke) and he finds an old lamp. He picks it up, rubs it and of course, a genie appears. The genie says "I am the most powerful genie that has ever lived. I can do great and wonderful things and I can grant you your dearest wish. But only one." Well, this accountant is a deeply caring individual. He pulls out a map of the Mediterranean area and says, "My dearest wish is that you solve the Arab-Israeli conflict in the Middle East." The genie strokes his beard and looks worried. "Oh dear, " he says , staring at the map. "That's a ... read more

It's 4:04. Do you know where your auditor is?