What does an octopus take on a camping trip? Tentacles.

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Q: Why can't black kids play in the the sandbox? A: Because the cats keep covering them up.

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One day two boys were walking through the woods when they saw some rabbit turds. One of the boys said, "What is that?" "They're smart pills," said the other boy. "Eat them and they'll make you smarter." So he ate them and said, "These taste like crap." "See," said the other boy, "you're getting smarter already."

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What do you call a cow who argues with her husband? A bullfighter.

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I got a cat the other day. I had to swerve, but I got it.

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