Girls dont dress for boys, they dress for themselves. If girls dressed for boys, they’d just walk around naked all the time.

 916

2  

My mother never understood the irony in calling me a “son-of-a-bitch".

 932

0  

My idea of “friends with benefits” is another one of my friends doing my laundry. What were you people thinking.. I have morals.

 903

3  

An evil person is like a dirty window, they never let the light shine through.

 856

2  

I’m a freelance gynecologist. How long has it been since your last checkup?

 920

0