Me: "Why am I still single?" Brain: "You're weird as shit." Body: "And you're fat." Face: "Plus you're ugly." Food: "But I'm here for you."

 843

0  

Women only need 3.5 inches to achieve maximum pleasure, …………………….. it’s called a credit card.

 914

10  

Girls dont dress for boys, they dress for themselves. If girls dressed for boys, they’d just walk around naked all the time.

 924

2  

You keep smiling like that and everyone is gonna wonder what you did last night..

 988

3  

Hands are so overrated..I think I’ll use my mouth..

 964

1