Girls dont dress for boys, they dress for themselves. If girls dressed for boys, they’d just walk around naked all the time.

 959

2  

I’m a freelance gynecologist. How long has it been since your last checkup?

 963

0  

Not all cute guys have girlfriends, most of them have boyfriends…

 1001

0  

My idea of “friends with benefits” is another one of my friends doing my laundry. What were you people thinking.. I have morals.

 949

3  

Me: "Why am I still single?" Brain: "You're weird as shit." Body: "And you're fat." Face: "Plus you're ugly." Food: "But I'm here for you."

 889

0